100 things to do

The index, in order of appearance;

  1. Unexpect the Expected;  Accept change – life arrives when it wants, how it wants.
  2. Make a will, not a wish;  Don’t let the inevitable get the better of your family.
  3. Culture shock – Bodily Functions;  Parenting over propriety; baby’s body isn’t programmed for civilised society.
  4. In pursuit of nappiness;  Nappies.  Your best friend.  Not glamorous.  Not inspiring.  Not optional.
  5. Convenience;  Make it easier to accommodate the challenges of baby care.
  6. I do so solemnly swear;  Train yourself not to swear in front of the children.
  7. Dad is the prey;  Parent-proofing.  Think and move more carefully around your home.
  8. Pick a month, any month;  Trying to schedule the birth month.  Contemplate but don’t fixate.
  9. Sleep – The Great Upheaval;  Night.  Day.  Disarray.  Sleep as you know it will end.
  10. Bed-addled;  On researching, acquiring and using a lot of different beds.
  11. Neonatal;  Surviving premature birth – life-support and special care in hospital.
  12. Procurement Strategy;  How will you get all the new stuff you need?
  13. The Knack; Banish abnormal challenges from the many manual tasks of parenting.
  14. All About That Bump; Celebrating pregnancy and building bonds – making welcome a beautiful promise.
  15. Resistance is Fertile; Take responsibility for your sperm; make the right lifestyle adjustments.
  16. The Cradle Will Rock; Man versus sleepy-time – the evolution of the evening in parenthood.
  17. In the Blink of an Eye; The curation of memories and evidence from each forgotten childhood.
  18. Wiped Out; The never-ending chore;  get ready to get hands on.
  19. Under Siege; System-attic or problem-attic.  Take control of your storage space.
  20. Joy; Sunlight in the storm – Bundles of joy, moments of elation.
  21. Clothing Down; More clothes than you can possibly imagine, or dispose of.
  22. Travel Policy; It’s not about the destination.  It’s about the journey.
  23. In. Out. Shake it all about; Man versus bath time – the evolution of washing our children.
  24. Futility room; Get busy living, or get busy laundry
  25. Learn to drive; Unlock multiple moderately life-changing parenting hacks with a driver’s license
  26. How to change a nappy; The most foul and disgusting part of being a parent?
  27. For crying out loud; Contemplating the seemingly unintelligible cacophony of infant rage and misery
  28. Rock-a-bye Rhapsody; Being a parent involves more singing and rhyming than anticipated
  29. Kerb your enthusiasm; The ups and downs of men, babies and steerable contraptions

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